The SDE: Spontaneous Diabetes Explosion
“Ok and with your steak tonight miss did you want a baked potato or french fries?”
“Um, neither, thank you. I’m good.”
“Are you sure, they come with the entrée for free?”
“No thank you I don’t want any. I have Type 1 diabetes and I just don’t eat potatoes that often. It’s not that I can’t eat them ever it’s just that they’re really hard to manage for me so I just generally don’t have them and it doesn’t bother me because I don’t even like potatoes that much and…” oh my god please stop talking Lexie this poor waiter doesn’t need to know all of this!
Ever found yourself over-explaining diabetes to a complete stranger for no reason? I found myself doing just that last Wednesday while at dinner by myself in a little town in Eastern Washington state. I was staying the night there for work, and had wandered to a local chain restaurant, laptop in hand, ready to crank our some work and enjoy a nice, low-carb steak and salad dinner. But apparently, one little question about potatoes was all I needed to turn in to an over-enthusiastic, over-sharing little bundle of TMI. And although I consider myself very open and willing to talk about having diabetes, this was a little much, even for me.
Why do these spontaneous diabetes explosions happen sometimes? Why do we sometimes feel the need to justify and explain our disease to some people - even if they couldn’t care less? And even for those who do care - do they really need ALL the details? Probably not.
I think the answer lies in the fact that for us folks with diabetes, our brain is so often crammed to limit with diabetes stuff, that it’s all we can do to keep it from spilling over some moments. What that waiter doesn’t know is that as I’m scanning the menu, I’m also clicking in the trend line on my CGM, thinking about my IOB, wondering if that 20 minutes on the elliptical is hitting me now, and curious if the their “world-famous steak glaze” is packed with sugar. It’s almost as if him coming up to take my order shocks me out of my little diabetes number-crunching bubble that I’m living in. It’s actually a wonder that more outbursts don’t occur, given the amount of time diabetes is running laps through my mind every day.
Some of these explosions occur more subtly. It’s those moments when a friend asks how you’ve been and you realize you spend 20 minutes talking about how absolutely bonkers your BGs have been for a few weeks. It’s the moment when your sister asks you if your pump is waterproof and you wax eloquent on diabetes innovations for the better part of an hour. I think what this shows about us is that we do have a tremendous need to talk about this disease. Because when we keep it all inside in that little bubble, it’s bound to burst at some point. Diabetes takes up way too much of our mental capacity to not overflow at some point.
If you’re lucky, these explosions land on family members who patiently listen, nod their head, ask questions, and support you. And if you happen to do it to the poor waiter in small-town Washington who was just freaking wondering if you wanted potatoes, well, just accept his polite and awkward smile and move on - no major damage from that explosion except maybe you gave him a funny story to tell his coworkers at the end of the night. And that’s ok!
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Comments
Several grins there, although it hasn’t happened to me yet. I am prone to do the same when someone mentions bicycles, though, so it’s probably a common problem. With different topics. I’m sure some people do it with football or something.
@Rich: English speakers! The question “How have you been?” is a question in the rest of the world. Spring that on me without coffee (or jetlagged) and you’re likely to get a proper reply. Which will then look like something about Diabetes, probably
Okay, I give in. It’s not only the English, it’s everyone. But us socially awkward people don’t get it 
“How have you been?”. expected answer:Fine
“Do you want fried or mashed potatoes with that?” non-disclosure answer: Double veggies, hold the carbos, would be great.
That’s most of the time. But I agree, sometimes when you least expect it, CORE DUMP TMI HAPPENS!! Occasionally I’ll pull out the d-card when being told I will be the last passenger served in the plane, or the business meeting is ordering pasta and rice for lunch. But most times I just keep it to myself or grab the ever-present emergency protein-bar rations always in my carry-on or laptop case.