The long haul.

Long Road aheadYou know how awesome that feeling is when you finally reach a goal that you’ve been trying to get to for SO LONG? It’s awesome right? You’re all doing a double fist pump in the air and like “Hellll yeeeaaaah I made it!” That’s how I felt when I hit my A1c goal of being under 6.5%.

But I totally forgot that with diabetes, it’s not enough to hit the goal. Nope, now you have to figure out how to stay there. Like, for a long time (by that I mean forever). And that, my friends, is not easy. Because you see, getting myself to that goal required major efforts, concentration, high BG stalking, and tons of lows. And all of the effort can lead to one major case of Diabetes Burnout, which is the where my head space has been for about two weeks. I’ve been training for my half marathon which has caused some wide swings in the old BG department, as well as trying to lose a few pounds I’ve put on while getting my said stellar A1c. And all of it – diabetes included – has made me feel like one big glass of Totally Over It with a side of Give a Crap.

I have always said that the strength we find in having diabetes is not about the painful injections or the sore fingertips from sticking yourself. The strength you need to live well with diabetes is the strength to get up and do it all again – over and over for the rest of your life. That’s the real challenge we all face with diabetes. And there are times – especially after putting in a highly concentrated effort for a while – that you mentally feel like “I just…can’t. Not today. I cannot.

But the thing is, I know that I can. I have before and I will again. I’ve literally gone years with an A1c under 7% before, so there’s no reason I can’t keep things under 6.5% for a while as Jacob and I start thinking about starting a family (no, this post is not a hint that I’m pregnant! That will be a totally different post and you all will know I mean business!). The challenge is in finding the strength to keep going when that’s the last thing you want to do.

I might be training for a mere half marathon in real life – but life with diabetes is the Ironman of chronic illnesses. I’m looking to make the podium – are you?

 

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Comments

Exactly. You hit the goal, and then the next goal is…”Ok, now hold that…forever”

My long-term goal is the 50 year Joslin. I was diagnosed at age 43, so 50 years would be an accomplishment!

I don’t know. I certainly notice that I can only do one of three things at once: Loose weight, get a low Hba1c, get a more stable diabetes. One, not even two.

And at the moment, I’m okay with that. I can change my focus from year to year and I can occasionally pursue goals that are outside of that list entirely. But I won’t worry myself to death over things I cannot control.

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